The New Beginning

The storms of my life had been surging for years. Ferocious winds and torrential rain continued to dance around me as my everyday struggles united, with the consequences of my weaknesses, desires and fears, to constitute what my life had become. Most times the howl of the wind was so violent; I only could hear the cry the storm produced. Other times, my heart beat so intense that I forgot the storm all together and focused on my fears and failings, yet another sign of my lack of faith in myself and my purpose. Though throughout the years in the midst of the dreadful thundering, was something else I heard, or rather something I felt. As a quick whisper among the winds as if it were my own voice, something, or rather,someone spoke peace and comfort to offer confidence and hope to my struggling and sometimes even perishing spirit.

Alright so while the optimism at the beginning of this blog is not as noticeable just yet, the truth is I'm searching for that hope. Hope in many things, among which is the hope that I can offer the right gifts and strength to a little boy named Austin which will enable him to feel his daddy's hand and moreover love in his life. I've been a dad now for nearly 6 months and I have failed at embracing the true identity of fatherhood. Thanks to the encouragement of my family and close friends, I'm starting to believe that its possible for me to find myself and be a good daddy.

There are those closest to me who honestly see things in me, which i don't (anymore). I'm very appreciative for their support and motivation in the process of rebecoming myself. If nothing else I hope this blog is seen as somewhat of a tribute and for the interest for those who have and are still helping me become the best version of myself.

The reality is i'm excited to be a dad. Although I'm nervous, scared, confused, discouraged, and everything in between, I've thought and felt things while in his presense i've never before experienced. I want to grow in this new responsibility and blessing. I want to reach bigger and better things not only for me but for that cute little guy named Austin. My little buck-a-roo!